I have a confession. Well, several actually.
One of my worst habits is reading the last page of a book first. I know, I know! I'm awful. What about the suspense, you say? I can hear my sister screaming at me, "JAYYYYNNNE."
Suspense, schmense. I don't do well with surprises.
The truth is, I tend to get a better feel as to whether or not I'll enjoy the book if I read the last page -- or at least the last paragraph. So I cheat. I can always pretend I haven't read it, can't I?
Second confession -- sometimes I skim read. I feel very guilty about this one because, as a writer myself, I know how much work goes into a book, so I ought to do the author justice by reading every word. But I'm an impatient reader and I like to be drawn thoroughly into the story. If that's not happening then I'll start to skim.
Third confession -- I'm a dreadfully picky reader. If there is one line that seems wrong to me, that's pretty much the book finished, because I won't be able to forget it. If there's animal cruelty in the book, I'm done. If it's set in England and the author has used too many American terms, I'm done. If its historical and there are too many anachronisms, I'm done. If it's a book with a storyline that's too predictable, too "trendy", or been done too often, I'm done.
So, being fully aware of my own shameful sins as a reader, when I write my own books, I do my best to prevent any other "JAYYYNNNE"s from skimming, rolling their eyes, or spoiling the story by guessing ahead. When they pick up one of my books I want them to think, "Ooh this sounds different and interesting", then to read every word and enjoy it. And when they get to the end, I want to leave them thinking about the story and the characters for at least a little while longer.
I've
always flirted with the idea of writing a book that could be read by starting
at any chapter and then reading in a circle --especially to thwart those who,
like me, flip to the last page first. Ha! What if a book could be begun
anywhere in the story and still enjoyed?
Well,
with The Peculiar Pink Toes of Lady Flora, I think I made a good effort at
writing a story just crazy enough for the chapters be read out of order and still
make sense by the end. I was tempted, in fact, to put the chapter numbers all
over the place, but I'm not sure the publisher --or the editor-- would have
appreciated my little joke.
Hmm.
I have no doubt a psychiatrist would have something to say about my slightly
masochistic desire to keep readers on their toes and spinning like Misty
Copeland or Darcey Bussell.
But
it's for their own good. I wouldn't want them to end up like me, huddled by the
library shelf, sneakily perusing final pages and convincing themselves that it's
all ok.
Because
sometimes, my friend, the last page is only the beginning.
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